a good time now

I came across this bit of a story while sipping coffee and reading James Ishmael Ford early Thursday morning – “In that book I recalled a friend, Bob Jessup. He had recently died from complications of the AIDS virus…. His partner, Jim Wilson, told me a small anecdote about those dying days. Jim was sitting with Bob and talking. He was filled with memories and sharing them with his dying partner. Jim said what good times those were. To which Bob replied, “I’m having a good time now.”

I was struck by this “Having a good time now.” Right now. With what’s going on. Me – I’m having a good time now performing the theater of welcome at the YMCA. I’m having a good time now sitting alone with a coffee at Starbucks. I’m having a good time now writing my rent check. I’m having a good time now since part of my tooth fell out. I’m having a good time now sitting at the light. I’m having a good time now reading the James Ishmael Ford book. I’m having a good time now getting up at 2:59. I’m having a good time now doing nothing.

There seems to be choice involved here – do I want to be miserable or joyful? But it’s more. Different. Other. Something else. Something like simply being the good time.

I’m having a good time now experiencing both joy and sorrow listening to this line from the song I posted here Monday: “Because I’m still in love with you, I want to see you dance again.”